lmfao hi!! it’s been awhile tumblr. y'all still remember me? chz

i’ll never get tired of saying this but i fucking hate school works that are done in pairs because i know that no one’s gonna choose me even if i already have an idea for that said activity. thanks for making me feel like a total loser, ma'am. 🙃

why am i inhibiting myself to enjoy this week? what’s holding me back? i hate myself sometimes.

i can’t sleep not because of me doing my assignments but because red alert dito sa zamboanga. pls not again.

change ko kaya username ko balik to gothicsiren? my first tumblr username ever hahaha 😂😂

oh well, at least i have the drive to study.

just read the conversation between my parents sa GC. bakit ganun parents ko? hindi pa ba sapat na mag-aral nang mabuti? because at this point, yun palang ang magagawa ko at partida na wala pa akong napapatunayan na i do well in school unlike sa kapatid ko na 3rd year highschool, andaming achievements. binibring up nila yung idea na babago lang ako ‘pag may work na ako as if hindi ako tumitino ngayon. alam ko i have negative traits pero i’m trying to change it at alam ko sarili ko na may nagbago sa akin. somehow. kahit nga ako nashock din kung paano ako mag-respond sa ibang bagay. hindi na ako sobra mag-react unlike before. kung may strong emotions man akong nararamdaman, nakokontrol ko na. i’m trying my best but i guess it wasn’t enough. maybe hindi nila nakikita yung changes kasi i am somehow distant.

basta. triggered lang ako nang kaunti about sa work thingy. it doesn’t have to be work as a manifestation na nagbago ka. there are other factors din naman and hays magulo utak ko ngayon. don’t mind this incomprehensible mess.